Free Video #2: Touch in Bedtime Stories

Even more on how to tell a story. Storytelling techniques with your own children need to include touch. When you buy the DaddyTeller.com book, you will be able to acces many more in-depth videos as well.


Get the DaddyTeller Paperback at Amazon.com via this link here.

You can buy the DaddyTeller Ebook at this link now.

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All the free vids are listed on this page here.

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10 Ways to Get Teenage Boys to Talk

(I originally wrote this article for youth workers, but it applies to anyone who has to communicate with a teenage boy, from pros to parents.)

1. Gather over food. Gather in small groups of just a few boys.

2. Use the “60 Second Rule:” Ask your question in 15 seconds and then wait for the answer for 45 seconds.

3. Use sideways conversations such as working side by side at a service project, in the passenger seat of a car or washing dishes after a fundraiser.

4. Put something in their hands. Our office is filled with toys, sports balls and magazines. Boys who are busy with their hands talk easier, even if they don’t look you in the eye all the time.

5. Go outside. Many times, leaders do too many conversations indoors. Grab a basketball and go outside. Go for a walk around the block. Take the whole group.

6. Don’t be afraid to ask emotional questions. But be ready for the answer to take several sessions to get back to you. Be patient.

7. Never take “I don’t know” as the first answer. Rephrase the question in fewer words. If that does not work, see number six above.

8. Before doing discussion sessions, write out the questions on paper and let the boys read them before you start the discussion.

9. Know what interests the boys you work with and talk about those things frequently: science, sports, music, computer and others.

10. Learn to use non face-to-face methods such as Email and Instant Messaging to build rapport and trust with boys between formal events.

***
Sean Buvala has worked with youth and families since 1985. He’s a professional storyteller and the author of the DaddyTeller book, which teaches dads to tell stories to their children. Sean says, “If you want your teen boy to talk to you at 14, you had better start telling him stories at 4.”

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Book Review for DaddyTeller

When Daddies Tell Stories

DaddyTeller: How to be a Hero to Your Kids and Teach Them What’s Really Important By Telling Them One Simple Story at a Time
Author: Sean Buvala
Ebook, 73 pages, $14.95

Quick—think of a story your father told you when you were a kid. Got it? Then you’re one of the lucky ones.

What will your children say to the same question twenty years from now? And when they look at you with those big eyes and plead, “Daddy, tell me a story,” what do you say? Do you grab a tried-and-true Golden Book of someone else’s words, or do you launch into a colorful yarn that keeps your kids entranced until the end and coming back for more?

Have you ever wished someone would put together a story-time instruction book for Daddies? Well, someone has.

DaddyTeller: How to be a Hero to Your Kids and Teach Them What’s Really Important By Telling Them One Simple Story at a Time, written by award-winning professional storyteller Sean Buvala, is a collection of eight fables, edited and arranged specifically for Daddies to share with their children. They’re easy to learn and fun to tell.

But DaddyTeller carries a double punch. Stories like “The Donkey Who Thought He Was a Lion,” “Apples For the Princess,” and “The Fisherman and His Wife” are not only bonding tools for parent and child. They also demonstrate the value of honesty, kindness, and integrity, warn of the danger of greed, and encourage a sense of self-worth that is all the more valuable to your children when it comes from you.

Each chapter presents one story in three different ways. First, the story is written out in its entirety, just as you would tell it to your child. Next, the same story is broken down into a “Brick and Mortar Reminder List” to jog your memory as you learn the sequence of events. Finally, the story is written out once again, but this time it is studded with action prompts and suggestions for funny faces and squeaky voices to capture the imagination of your audience.

Not a performer? Don’t worry. Sean’s aim is to get you telling stories to your children as soon as possible, and this he does with warmth and humor. The “coaching” instructions sprinkled throughout each story, down to what to do with your hands, will have you up and running even if you’ve never told a story in your life.

The first two chapters of DaddyTeller are also designed to set you at ease. Chapter One is a “quick-start, ten-step get-going guide” that outlines exactly what to do first, from choosing the lesson you want to share with your child (like honesty or kindness) to the nuts and bolts of how to do it. Chapter Two digs a little deeper into what you can expect from this special time with your kids—pointing out, for example, that “a story told with bumps and mistakes is better than not telling at all.”

“Making mistakes is part of the process,” Sean writes. “Don’t wait to be perfect before telling stories to your kids.”

Nevertheless, DaddyTeller has been thoughtfully compiled to include all the help you need to make story time a success. There are eight stories in the e-book itself, plus a link to a ninth story. In addition, Sean offers support for the novice storyteller in the form of audio training and video instructions that can be found at www.daddyteller.com. You can also sharpen your technique by watching video clips of Sean himself telling stories.

Storytelling as a way to communicate right living has surely been around as long as humans have walked the planet. Campfire lessons on the difference between good and bad choices have gone a long way toward preservation of our species.

And, really, not much has changed over the millennia. The fact is that today children all too often look to movies and television for those lessons, with varying results. Yet a beloved story told over and over by Dad, delivering the message Dad wants delivered, can pierce the jumble of voices in a child’s mind and shine like a jewel.

DaddyTeller is a good idea realized just in time. The book promises to show Dads how to teach kids what’s really important, and in this Sean Buvala seems to be on the right track. One of the greatest DaddyTeller lessons your kids may take with them down the road is that nothing in the world can ever be more important than spending time with their own kids.

For this reviewer, the book’s cover picture says it all: Look into your child’s eyes. And let him look into yours. DaddyTeller gives you a way to do just that.

*****
Durga Walker created this review at our request.

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Three Tips To Enjoy the “Father Role” in Bedtime Stories

Are you part of the 45% of fathers who won’t do a very crucial parenting job? It’s a great “job” that is fun, increases their children’s school success and builds the important father/child relationship.

According to a May 2009 poll by the National PTA, nearly half of men surveyed report that they do not participate in the essential family ritual of bedtime stories. Hearing and telling bedtime stories helps children both bond with their parents and increase their school success. As well, surveys also indicate that children who have actively involved fathers do better in school and have less issues with drugs and alcohol as teens.

Sean Buvala, a professional national storyteller and author of the book “DaddyTeller: How to Be a Hero to Your Kids and Teach Them What’s Really Important by Telling One Simple Story at a Time,” shares these three tips to help dads be more involved in bedtime stories with their children:

1. Alternate between reading books and telling stories.

There is a great emphasis on picking up storybooks and reading stories to children. Reading to children is a good thing and should be part of every father’s daily (or at least weekly) plan. For an even bigger impact on your kids, put down the storybook and tell stories to your children. The DaddyTeller books contains eight stories and step-by-step directions to tell each story. Not only will you model communication skills for your children, but you will start developing an in-your-head collection of stories that you can share with them at a moment’s notice. As your confidence in storytelling and your story repertoire grows, you will be even more confident in participating in the important bedtime story ritual in your own home.

2. Make bedtime stories a two-way conversation.
In telling stories to your kids, they will start to learn the rhythm and flow of the stories you tell them. Learn to stop telling a story and ask, “What happens next?” Help your child to think about the future of characters in books or your oral stories. For example, in the “Lion and the Mouse” story by Aesop, ask your child to imagine and share with you how the Lion and Mouse might be friends in the future or to make up stories about where the mouse lives. You can download this story and instructions for free from www.daddyteller.com .

3. Don’t take yourself too seriously.
Although storytelling is a powerful tool to help you child succeed in school and life, bedtime stories should be fun. Take the pressure off yourself to be a faultless parent in every breath and action you take. In the DaddyTeller book, you will learn just how and when to use a funny story.

You can spend lots of time learning to tell the perfect story perfectly, but in the end, the relationship you are building and the time you spend together with your kids is more important than perfect storytelling techniques. Some fathers will worry more about getting it right than getting in front of their children. Look your child in the eye and tell them stories. If laughing and giggling occurs, that is a good thing, too. Sometimes the “father role” is just being the giggle-man with the funny bedtime stories.

Dads! Don’t be part of the nearly 50% of fathers that miss one of the most important parts of their child’s lives and development. Share stories with your kids to improve their future!

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Sean Buvala is the author of DaddyTeller™, which teaches dads how to tell bedtime stories for children. You can find his book at http://www.daddyteller.com

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DaddyTeller Cover File Bedtime Stories

Download a .pdf copy of the complete DaddyTeller™ paperback book cover. Use this link below:

DaddyTeller Complete Book Cover

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Free Video #1: Just Start Telling Stories

You can tell great bedtime kids stories! But you have to get started. Just. Do. It.

You can buy the DaddyTeller book at this link now.

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All the free vids are listed on this page here.

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Telling Bedtime Stories: DaddyTeller Training Video

When you buy the DaddyTeller book or Ebook, you get access to some free audio and video training. Here is a sample of one of these short videos. We talk about the father role in telling funny bedtime stories or any type of bedtime stories. Here’s the sample.

You can buy the DaddyTeller book at this link now.

Add to Cart

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Video: Three Dad Tips

Here’s a short video for fathers to learn some quick family communication skills. When you are done, please visit the front page and pick up our DaddyTeller Ebook.

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3 Quick Ways for Dad to Communicate Better with His Child

The world needs fathers. Study after study confirms the important role of the father in a family. Let’s improve your father-children relationship. Here are three quick and easy ways for Dads to relate better to their children.

1. Put down the distractions.
If you want to communicate better with your young kids, then learn to pay attention. Listening to a child while you channel surf, web surf or refrigerator surf is not really listening. Put down the remote or the mouse or close the ‘fridge door. Pay attention to what your child is saying. By the way, this rule changes a bit when your kids, especially your sons, are older. A great way to get your teens to talk is do a shared activity together. You’ll notice that I used the word “shared” in that sentence, right?

2. Look your child in the eye.
All the media your child is exposed to shares one thing in common: all of it has your child’s eyes and ears glued upon it. When you talk to your child, do you have their eye-contact? One of the greatest gifts we give to our children is looking them in the eye. Let them see you seeing them. Put down the storybook and tell them a story. Involve them in the tale. Advertisers are not hesitant to look your kids in the eye. You should do no less.

3. Make your child’s needs the priority.
As more and more dads, thankfully, become much more active in parenting, I read more about fathers who do not like kiddie things. I have read several posts, for example, about how some stay-at-home dads don’t like kid’s music and wish to substitute rock artists for kids musicians.

Although some of these daddy-blogger posts are written tongue-in-cheek, there is an underlying issue: kid things are not designed for dads. They are designed for kids. Don’t be in a hurry to bypass the usefulness of all the kiddie toys and noise that is out there.

The “Wheels On The Bus” song is driving you crazy? Let it make you crazy and let your kids listen to it a hundred times a day if they want. Raising four kids in our house, I can assure you that this phase doesn’t last long. Very soon, you’ll be dealing with the wheels on the car which is under your teen’s control as it is driven from your home.

The repetition of songs and stories is important for your child’s development and even future skills for learning and school. Be focused on what your kids need, not what you want.

In reality, all three of these ideas are really expressing the same need: Dads, give your kids the gift of your attention. You don’t need to be father of the year. You need to be the best daddy you can to your kids.

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Sean Buvala, father of four and a professional storyteller, is the author of the book “DaddyTeller™: Be a Hero to Your Kids and Teach Them What’s Really Important by Telling Them One Simple Story at a Time.” Get your copy by visiting http://www.daddyteller.com.

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